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Guilt and Shame – politicalbetting.com
Guilt and Shame – politicalbetting.com
I am an adoptive father, twice over. Like all adopters, I have been mandated/encouraged/enabled to undertake a range of training and education on how the minds of children develop and work, and how trauma and neglect can affect that. Many adopters say lightheartedly that we are lucky, because all parents should have access to what we learn.
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Thanks for the piece, James. The new series of Dr Who (first 2 episodes already on iPlayer) explores themes around adoption.
Labour’s VAT plans blamed for fall in private school entries
Enrolments are expected to drop even further this September as parents are deterred by higher fees, which could rise by up to 20%
The number of children joining private schools has dropped by the largest proportion in more than a decade, new figures reveal.
Enrolments at independent schools this academic year have fallen by 2.7 per cent, according to a report by the Independent Schools Council (ISC), the largest annual drop since it began collecting data on new starters in 2011.
The body, which represents almost 1,400 private schools, said Labour’s pledge to remove the VAT exemption for fees deterred parents from committing to private education this year and predicted numbers would drop further this autumn. Experts say the policy could lead some schools to close.
https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/private-school-students-fees-closing-down-labour-vat-plans-06ndtdr9q
The party has said it is in talks with more Conservatives after Natalie Elphicke and Dan Poulter crossed the floor.
And a list being shared in Labour circles, and seen by The Times, contains 26 Tories who could be targeted.
The “defection watch” list has been drawn up based on a number of factors including whether the MP is standing at the next election, the size of their majority and their position on issues such as Brexit, the conversion therapy ban and cuts to foreign aid.
Starmer said on Friday that Elphicke joining his party’s ranks reflected the mood of the country as Rishi Sunak was “clinging on” to power.
https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/tory-mps-defecting-labour-wes-streeting-qrz96pztr
But then,,, moving on to the world of politics.... Why have so many of our political leaders in recent years behaved so badly?
"Ukrainian SSO SOF operator under the aurora, Donetsk Oblast."
https://twitter.com/Osinttechnical/status/1789094460086685974
https://arstechnica.com/science/2024/05/elon-musks-neuralink-reports-trouble-with-first-human-brain-chip/
We complain about politicians who don't tell us the truth about tradeoffs, or who stick to dumb plans long after they should have been binned... But then we vote for them.
Most people make a reasonable attempt at navigating the world by the map they possess. Sometimes, those maps are tragically inaccurate... or rather, people have life stories that means that their world consists only of the worst bits of our world.
But sometimes, it is the case that the world rewards behaviours that, if we stop and think, we probably shouldn't. It may have been better all round had someone said "this subpostmasters thing... it's not right, is it?" But I fully get why nobody did. People with a profound moral core are uncomfortable to be around.
*) Politics can mean power and prestige; even a local backbench MP has this, and power and prestige can attract the wrong sort of person; or corrupt.
*) They are constantly under the microscope, in a way you or I are not. We may do something silly, or wrong in a minor way, and no-one will comment. If an MP does it, then it is ammunition for their opponents.
*) They often get asked to do things not necessarily in their competence, or outside their expertise domain. This leads to mistakes.
*) Some are genuinely wrong 'uns.
*) We notice the occasions when MPs do bad things, as they appear in the papers or on the news. We don't notice when they do good things, e.g. helping constituents. Because that's not newsworthy.
If I was an MP I'd probably be in the papers every other month. And I don't think I'm necessarily a bad person; just utterly unsuited for that role.
Stable, caring, and loving families are essential for children. It's deeply sad not all have them.
https://www.ft.com/content/9b79b340-50e0-4813-8ed2-42a30e544e58
A good early start to life is so important in terms of relationships and self worth. Our prisons are full of people who used to be in care. We could do a lot better as a society.
Because I'm a nerd I do a lot of my reading of philosophical and psychological topics through the medium of science fiction novels, and coincidentally I've just finished reading a book that looks at similar ideas. It's called "Dogs of War" by Adrian Tchaikovsky.
One of the ideas that the book explores is the extent to which free will is a burden. Having someone else to tell you what is good and what is bad is a lot easier, and can be a lot more comfortable, than having to decide oneself.
I think that, in a complicated world, this helps to explain the attraction of religion and demagogic leaders, who provide a degree of simplicity and certainty that is otherwise lacking. And, on a smaller scale, perhaps also gang leaders and abusers, whose outward displays of self-confidence can be attractive to those without it.
The sequel to the book, "Bear Head" is also really interesting, and its look at how hierarchies function and develop reminded me of some of the things our Malmesbury has talked about. The idea of the difference between the game (doing your job well) and the metagame (looking like you're doing your job well), in terms of who gets ahead is right on the nose.
Which reminds me, I’d better send her a message today to say happy anniversary!
I like the idea of the difference between guilt and shame. The problem I see in the real world is that the vast majority of nasty/wicked/selfish deeds are never punished. The correlation therefore breaks down.
All too often in my job I see bewildered accused in the dock not really understanding what they have done wrong or why they are being held to account. Often, this is because this happened to them and they don't know any better. At least equally often, however, this is because they have never developed the moral or ethical compass that allows them to see that the consequences for their victims are as important or more important than the benefit for themselves.
Religious teaching used to fill this gap to some extent. The story of the Good Samaritan is one of Jesus's most important parables. He was teaching his followers to care. How do we teach this in a largely agnostic or atheist society? Like James, I think that the answer must come in the home from engaged, compassionate parents who understand what they are doing and what the real lessons are.
https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/vat-england-hmrc-richmond-independent-schools-council-b2352729.html
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9hqE5HVVQk
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adrian_Tchaikovsky
Putting everything onto one or two parents creates a single point of failure. We need to have more adults more involved in children's upbringing so that the damage done by parents who fail is minimised.
Mr. Viewcode, I really liked his Shadows of the Apt (well, first two books, the pricing of the e-books was a bit high). As an aside, he also contributed to the Journeys anthology (which has a story by me in it).
Children of Time did give me nightmares because I'm arachnophobic, though.
The order is problematic with Netherlands on immediately before Israel.
Got to say I enjoyed some of Children in Time, the Tyrant Philosophers series is fun and the 2 chapters of Service Model i've read have led me to order it at full price.
And the latter is somethingI never do, my book purchasing habit is look at Kindle's Daily Deal and if it looks interesting buy it. Which means I have 500 or so kindle books waiting for me to finish the current book and randomly select another one.
If you want other authors - Katherine Addison Goblin Emperor and its two sequels are very good, Any Becky Chambers is worth reading
On our usual fare, I note two more new polls showing a 2-3% rise in Labour's lead to the 20+ range.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Opinion_polling_for_the_next_United_Kingdom_general_election
It isn't a very representative sample though, and there are also some very people coming out of very unpromising backgrounds and making things out of their lives. Angela Rayner is perhaps the best example, even if not everyone's cup of tea. Expressing her anger at social inequality first through Trade Union activity, then politics.
Anger is a powerful emotion, but it isn't a single emotion. There is the anger that drives violent retribution, but also righteous anger where someone is spurred to activism. Jesus overturning the tables of the money changers in the temple for example.
It's a common meme but I wonder if there is any evidence to back it up.
(Sorry!)
Guilt/blameless "It wasn't me guv"
Shame/self esteem "I'm the chosen one"
I'd like to echo others' gratitude for the article, both because the insight you offer James and because of the way it invites us to empathise with those who have experienced trauma young (as well as those who foster/adopt - you undertake a hugely challenging role). Thanks for posting it.
@davidl it reads as though your experience of those in court without a moral or ethical compass is much more widespread than just those who have been fostered or adopted; nevertheless I think @jamesdoyle's central point stands - I strongly suspect that you see people who are somehere on a continuum of having experienced abuse and neglect when they were young.
Is/was religion the answer to teaching people that compass? In my view it relies too much on extrinsic punishment/reward (do this or you'll go to hell) whereas the best parenting encourages intrinsic rewards for acting in a pro-social way (this feels good because it is the right thing to do in and of itself). There are kids like this in every year of school and I always want to ring up the parents for parenting advice!
A couple of further thoughts: the best parenting relies hugely on parents themselves having advantages/privileges (enough money, time and space at home not to be constantly stressed, for example). Which makes poor parenting quite an intractable problem.
Separately, the late philosopher Derek Parfit and others argued that 'blame' as a concept is almost always inadequate: almost everyone does things that seem the right thing at the time, based on their experiences and needs. So, starting from where we are now, teaching people resilience and self-mastery to eg delay gratification is a vital part of parenting. This is something that religions do well imo. Yet this is almost precisely the opposite of many aspects of young people's lives right now, primarily because of the instant dopamine hit phones give kids just as their brains are developing rapidly. We should be much braver on restricting access to smartphones for this reason amongst many others.
I've tried to instil a live and let live thing in the kids. Be yourself, be kind, don't do stuff which - accident or by design - pisses people off. Thats not to say I'm a great role model, but I *try* to be.
1) Quite a number of private schools are *already* hiking fees in anticipation of a VAT/business rate increase to build up a war chest to cushion future shocks;
2) They are also hiking fees to deal with rapidly increasing costs, particularly fuel but also staffing and insurance, especially vehicle insurance;
3) They are also not immune to the collapsing numbers of children actually being born. Indeed, as those demographics where the birth rate is declining most slowly tend also to be the poorest, they're being hit harder than anyone else.
However, on the specifics of VAT and business rates for those schools (actually a minority, but including most private schools that have secondary aged children) there are some key issues.
It doesn't affect Eton, Winchester, Wellington, Roedean, CLC, Clifton, Westminster etc. Their parents are (a) rich enough to afford VAT and (b) mostly live overseas anyway and you would be surprised* at the tricks overseas owners can get up to to avoid taxes and charges. There is one private school in Staffs that hasn't paid a penny of tax in ten years despite making vast profits because its owners in Shanghai never actually send the fees over from China. They also have a wider pool of recruits to draw on. Finally, they have literally billions in endowments (ironically, several are so rich they have no need to charge fees if they don't wish to).
So extra taxes and charges will do no harm to those parts that not only entrench inequality but turn out students brilliant at passing exams and utterly convinced of their own intellectual superiority but actually rather intellectually lazy, bad at understanding complex problems and too full of themselves to learn new stuff.
But it will be a killer for small private day schools, which are actually by far the most useful and least damaging of the private school sector. I am dubious as to how many will survive the next five years even with the skyrocketing number of EHCPs which the state sector simply can't cope with.
This, therefore, is a policy set to do the opposite of what is intended. I therefore suggest it is a bad policy.
*apart from TSE obviously as it's his job.
So what is the point? Aggression is stupid. Stupid passive aggression doubly so.
PS: luckily I have managed to avoid all the rubbish and not heard one note of any of the crap Eurovision mince.
(Incidentally he does sound a pretty nasty piece of work, and I hope you're feeling a bit less shaken this morning.)
"Revolution and Restoration", Dr David Starkey, New Culture Forum 2024 Conference, YouTube, 54mins, see https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RVa27KpH--U
(it's too long for a quick AI summary, apologies)
What chance do prisoners have of discovering (or-rediscovering) their moral compass in a broken system, where prison education is appalling, overcrowding is rife, self-harm is common, and people are often locked up in inhumane conditions? See last week's damning inspection report on Wandsworth, as one of many examples.
[1] https://www.waterstones.com/book/cameron-at-10/anthony-seldon/peter-snowdon/9780007575534
We need to leave people to be free. They will make mistakes but finally I suppose - and I may now be exhibiting absurd naivete - they will get it right..."
We have forgotten this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RVa27KpH--U
North London, right now... although while it looks like that thru the phone camera, to the naked eye it's really faint.
https://vf.politicalbetting.com/discussion/comment/4777574#Comment_4777574
Every other virtue is useless without courage. It is why I repudiate with passion the word "victim". I hate that word.
We're turning ourselves into a supine culture of victimhood and it's contemptable and it will reap the rewards which contempt deserves. But that courage has got to say the unsayable..."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RVa27KpH--U&t=2289 (approx)
It's a bit like when a tightrope walker slips, to show the audience how difficult their act is, and how they really are dicing with death.
I don’t think, actually, that the perceived culprit was to blame!
Gove is off his head & Boris is a tw*t,
Moggsy's out of touch & Rishi is so weak,
Dowden is a weirdo & Shappsy is a freak,
It's time for them to go, so everybody shout,
Bugger off, leave us be, pack your bags...GET OUT!
https://twitter.com/Wakethefitup/status/1788613121340260533
The first line perhaps dates it a bit; this was amongst the replies:-
To quote a favourite line from Saki: Longfellow at his best wrote nothing like that.
https://twitter.com/deiradiotes/status/1788931830323789970
Not going down too well in the US by all accounts
But if we really want to sort out the issues with Eton, Roedean etc, disendowment is going to be needed.
It was a ready to roll plan and simply required Parliamentary approval; the government could be seen to be doing something!
Netanyahu is the sort of man who could start a fight in an empty room and then blame the light fitments.
Even when he's not provoked he's still an absolute twat.
Slavery (US), Ireland (UK), Holocaust (Germany) etc
On a couple of things:
yes, absolutely this applies beyond children who have been in care. There are lots of people out there whohave suffered neglect or abuse during their early years, which forms their personallity and worldview. Some manage their issues, others can't, but they do exist.
I am strongly of the view that it's very, very common among people who get caught up in crime - the demographic data on prisoners shows a strong correlation with the same factors found in neglected/abused children, so it would be a surprise if it didn't. As such, using this as a way to model likely behaviour and reactions, and to plan how to work wihth prisoners to improve their oppounrtieis and behvaiour, would be a great way forward.
Interestingly, my niece was for a few years recently head of education for a group of high security prisons in London, and she had independently arrived at a similar conclusion, and it helped her enormously in reaching out to the prisoners and getting good results. Sadly she left because the minister responsible didn't like her working methods, and thought that prison was for punishment, not rehabilitation.
Hmm. There was another point someone made that I was going to respond to, but I've forgotten it. Need to go back and check!
You have an unbelievably authoritarian mindset immediately reaching for a ban of things that you personally don’t like
I envy you...