The prison governor is gutted, one less prisoner means lost profits. (View Post)

Slight problem with that - they have to want to spend their life with me. (View Post)

Whenever my dishwasher breaks down I dump her and pull a new one. (View Post)

It the dog was female he could have called her Rose and got middle class ladies all aquiver in the park by shouting “Wait Rose”. (View Post)

Why did you name your dog after a sofa shop that has constantly got a sale running? (View Post)